Posts tagged: bariatric surgery

Lost 16 Pounds First 2 Weeks Post Op-YEAH!

I got good news today-I lost 16 lbs since 1/10/08. I was kind of happy and kind of disappointed. I know it sounds silly but I really thought it would be more. I am so good at sabotaging myself! So, I am thrilled with my weight loss and just don’t know how to get my mind around the big picture.

I find the urge to binge still hits and while I am not “beating the band” with ice cream I have pushed a few other limits. I am frustrated to find that I still must do things like feel myself and plan meals. A part of me wishes that I could just never have to eat!

If I plan and eat well then I do not get over hungry and I am ok. Tonight I went to a 4:20 movie with a friend (Pixie Momma-Busy Tarp) and did not want to deal with dinner after it was over. By the time she left my house it was 7pm and I was really hungry. I was afraid and overwhelmed. I find hunger so overwhelming! I overate. Still not too bad thanx to the band. But I am reminded of how well the band is working and how I still have to care for myself. Urgh! I just can’t be one of those gorgeous, skinny women who never stop to eat. I guess it does not serve them either.

Also, I ran out of a few foods that I rely on and thought I could just adapt. Well I didn’t do so great.

But-Good news. A friend called out to me today-she called “Goddess” and I responded without thinking! Yeah!

I am going to re-commence writing to my angels. I used to channel angels a lot but tapered off due to lots of things. If anything worth repeating comes out, I will post.

-Blessed Be

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categories goddessness, lap band, share | | datetime January 26, 2008 1:54 am | comments Comments (1)

Goddessness And The Power Of Positive Thinking

Ugh-I had the Upper GI today-I had to drink barium (YUCH) and stand/lie on this x-ray table while they xrayed my digestion in “action”. The coolness of the whole thing was eclipsed by the yuchiness of the whole thing. But I survived-and am back to my young self after a few cups of cocoa.

One thing that I thought was really interesting was after I drank one of the cups of barium. It landed in my stomach and they wanted it to work it’s way through to my small intestines. They asked me to think about eating foods that I really enjoyed. I had been thinking about how much I wished I could puke up the gross stuff in my tummy. Apparently this type of thinking actually impacts one’s digestion-halting it almost completely. Even according to straight doctor types. Then when thinking of lasagne and ice cream the barium went happily on it’s way.

I was struck by several things. First of all, that damn positive thinking thing, which I hear so much about to the point where I want to shoot the next person with a grenade launcher who tells me to say an affirmation to cure what ails me, apparently is very powerful after all. (Curse you Louise Hay, chiropractors and my mother-I hate it when you’re right!) Also, in the midst of a medical procedure to prepare me for weight loss surgery, I had to talk out loud about foods that I like. I was really ashamed.

And now, the airy-fairy realm of feelings about food is actually a real thing-which effects my ability to digest food. So, I will pray and affirm in a very positive way to have positive feelings about digesting what I eat.

Maybe if I think about celery when I eat a cookie, my body will respond as if it was celery?

So today, no matter what I eat, I say…I am eating celery-mmmm-yummy celery.

Also, I love my body-no matter what size she is and love to digest food and derive nutrients from it. I deserve health and happiness and goddessness. Yummy!

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categories lap band, share | | datetime December 27, 2007 5:08 pm | comments Comments (2)

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